Biggest bollock dropped at work?

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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by Bag Lady »

Ravenette wrote:A pair of sheers in Homebase! Oops!
Dropping them is the only way to explain bush trimming properly, you don't want to get sold the wrong equipment.
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by Ravenette »

Bag Lady wrote:
Ravenette wrote:A pair of sheers in Homebase! Oops!
Dropping them is the only way to explain bush trimming properly, you don't want to get sold the wrong equipment.
Ouch! Cutting oneself with a razor is bad enough - let alone a hedge trimmer for a sheer drop!
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by Sword sparkle »

Years ago I signalled a train towards Folkestone/Dover when it should have gone to Canterbury. Off the train went in the wrong direction and eventually went the right way later but was half an hour late. Whoops.
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by PaulinLondon »

This thread needs reviving.

Over to you...
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by sewer rat »

i used to work in the dye house part of the Russell Athletic factory beside me. We had to dye the fabric which also included filling buckets with chemicals to be added at specific times. Bored one backshift, i gave this new guy (who was a lazy pain in the arse) a sheet of paper with a list of chemicals to get and put next to a machine....acids, peroxides, salt etc and the last one on the list was 250L of Reponse FG. He was looking all over the factory for this stuff. I had seen an advert for this on tv the previous night....Reponse was a female lubricant available at all Boots shops....i added the FG....that stood for Fanny Gel.
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by MULLY »

Hoped I wouldn't have to post on this thread but an ovoid reproductive organ was dropped last Thursday night and came back to haunt me today as I was called into the boss' office for a right royal dressing down.

Last week I booked a half day Thursday to go out and watch the Liverpool v Dortmund Cup match and on the off chance of a hangover (either celebratory or depressed) I also booked the Friday off too. Anyway.... the match turned out to be a come-back classic and the bar was in joyous mood - the drink was flowing - me and my mates were in good form. I get a text from Sharon congratulating me on the result and so, following our 'in-joke' from Manchester, I replied "I'm moist, extremely moist LOL". Following up with "I'm now heading into town to get even wetter". Queen of the double entendre would love it.

At this point I wonder how Sharon got my mobile number only to realise it was my 'new' boss from work. My mates were ripping the complete fuck outta me and we had a good laugh about it. Perhaps if I had off have been sober(er) I might have texted to admit to the error, but I was out on the piss and never really thought about it again that night.

It dawned on me the next day, but ashamed and a tad embarrassed, I refrained from contacting her again. She was off work yesterday, so I sorta forgot about it. Perhaps in hindsight I shoulda made a point of going to her office first thing and admitting the error. But no - she'll have understood??. An hour into the day, I get called in and had to explain myself and got lectured on the dangers of inappropriate comments to work colleagues, her disappointment I didn't text back upon realising the mistake or not seeking her out this morning to apologise.

Came out off her office feeling about two inches tall, head bowed back to my desk.

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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by iain »

shoukd have told Sharon not to be texting you outside work hours on non work related topics.
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by PaulinLondon »

iain wrote:shoukd have told Sharon not to be texting you outside work hours on non work related topics.
Iain makes an extremely good point.

"Moist" and "happy" have five letters. You might have been able to blame predictive text from your mobile but I don't think that would have worked.

"...extremely happy.." as opposed to, "...extremely moist....".

But as Iain says, why was she texting you ? None of her business.

Seems to me like you have a dinner date in the making.
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by MULLY »

Very valid point Iain.

Bit too late now though - I explained my mistake and apologised. Nothing more to it - but I will keep that up my sleeve if anything more comes off it (but I think the matter has been dropped).

Just get on with it.

And she can go get fucked if she's looking a dinner date LOL
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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by theraven1979 »

That's a good one Mully. You should come out of the meeting room and texted her "I'm totally dry and flaccid" :)

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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by MULLY »

theraven1979 wrote:That's a good one Mully. You should come out of the meeting room and texted her "I'm totally dry and flaccid" :)

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Re: Biggest bollock dropped at work?

Post by strangledinAuch »

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