Burning Up Time - The Stranglers and Hugh Cornwell Unofficial Forums

Nothing grabbed me at all from the BBC's coverage.

And the Lord said to John "Come forth and receive eternal life." However John came fifth and got a toaster.

When you look really closely, all mirrors look like eyeballs..... My wife accused me of being immature, so I told her to get out of my fort. Just asked the wife what she's burning for dinner. Turned out it was my clothes. Honesty may be the best policy, but by a process of elimination, dishonesty is...

A guy was up in court for repeatedly battering his wife. The judge asked him why he kept beating her. He said,

"I don't know, maybe it's my weight and superior footwork......."

Too difficult. Picked four bands from that era I love and still play regularly. If a gun was put to my head I might have to say The Clash, but in reality it's probably whichever I have listened to most recently!!

What’s got 25 doors that won’t open?


George Bush’s advent calendar.

Hello, You've called The Incontinence Hotline ....... Can you hold please??

I'm currently doing an assignment for my Latin course, and cannot for the life of me remember what the Roman numerals are for 1, 1000, 51, 6 or 500. I'm livid.

Seeing the Nephs for the first time next month. Never had the chance before, so really looking forward to it. Think The Church are supporting.

There's a Haircut 100 concert on Sky's Love channel at the moment.

If you've missed the start you can catch it on Love + 1

Most people have 206 bones in their body but I have nearly 300. Yes, kippers for breakfast again!

A tree house is the ultimate insult.

You're saying, "I killed a friend of yours, please hold him for me..."