Crap Joke No.83840370

[jason]

Will my continental quilt still work after Brexit?!!

[iain]

I visited my local Health Centre complaining of feeling like a Jelly Baby.......

...the G.P. ate my face off

Appreciated in NI!

[droopsnoot]

I hear Sinead 'O' Conner is doing Barry Chuckles remembrance service.

They've chosen 'Nothin Compares, To Me ..... To You'

Capture.JPG (73.25 KiB) Viewed 2762 times

[jason]

Do the Wasps rugby team have a bee team?

[Boody]

Charles Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities was first serialised in two UK local newspapers.

It was the Bicester Times, it was the Worcester Times.

Well I got it and it gave me the best laugh I have had in a while. Thanks Droopsnoot.

Me too!

(Hi Boody )

Hi Bag Lady

[jason]

Just been offered 8 legs of venison for £50, is that two deer?

[cerdan6899]

To the person who stole my antidepressants...i hope your happy now.

[jason]

I kept getting a withheld number calling my mobile. So in the end I answered it an whoever it was on the other end sneezed, coughed 6 times, blew their nose an promptly hung up...

I hate cold callers!

[jason]

I’m going to France tomorrow for the world "Flicking A Ruler On The Edge Of A Desk" championships. It's held annually in the Dordogne.....

[droopsnoot]

My girlfriend was dating a circus clown before we met. I have some pretty big shoes to fill.

[jason]

Just had my scan result back from the hospital. They think I may have pneumonoulcramicroscopicsillcovolcaneoccollosis, but at the moment it’s difficult to say.

[MULLY]

I've recently started dating one of a pair of identical twins.

My mate asked how I tell them apart (avoiding any embarrassment).

I replied - luckily Susan always wears purple nail varnish and Brian has a cock!!