Crap Joke No.83840370

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jaydee1964
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jaydee1964 »

Mint

"The ending of the day.......brings the cccaaaalllllmmm,that you've been waiting for........."
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Ravenette
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Ravenette »

How do you make a hormone?

Refuse to pay her!
I've got some chloroform and handcuffs, just for you.
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jaydee1964
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jaydee1964 »

My dad once asked me what I wanted for Xmas ..I said I want something to wear and something to play with ...he got me a pair of trousers and cut the pockets out of them

"The ending of the day.......brings the cccaaaalllllmmm,that you've been waiting for........."
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jaydee1964
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jaydee1964 »

I said iv got my eye on a bike he said keep your eye on it you'll never get your arse on it ...he's like like my dad ....type of guy that turned the gas off when he turns his bacon over ..painted the electric meter pink and told us it was a piggy bank

"The ending of the day.......brings the cccaaaalllllmmm,that you've been waiting for........."
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jaydee1964
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jaydee1964 »

Eeerrrrmm

"The ending of the day.......brings the cccaaaalllllmmm,that you've been waiting for........."
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jaydee1964
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jaydee1964 »

The doorbell rang ..I knew it was the mother in law ..the mice were throwing themselves on the traps :(

"The ending of the day.......brings the cccaaaalllllmmm,that you've been waiting for........."
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Five Minutes
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Five Minutes »

After 17 job interviews, and still no job,

I'm beginning to think wearing my lucky track suit isn't so lucky.
Last time I came here a friend of mine just got triple-jacked over a steeplehammer and jessop jessop jessop jessop jessop
droopsnoot
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by droopsnoot »

The wife was texting me all day yesterday saying she was in casualty, I watched all 50 minutes of it last night and I didn't see her once.
She's still not home yet either & I'm getting hungry !!
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Ian9331
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Ian9331 »

A vampire bat came flapping in from the night, face all covered in blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.
Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.
He told them to piss off and let him get some sleep, but they persisted until he finally gave in. “Okay, follow me.” he said, and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him, tongues hanging out for blood.
As they came across a large field, the bat stopped and hovered. All the other bats slowed and hovered too. “Do you see that large oak tree over there?” he asked. “YES, YES, YES!” the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
“Good!” said the bat, “Because I fuckin’ didn’t!”
Maybe I'll find love when there's nothing to do........
Burn e 77
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Burn e 77 »

Ian9331 wrote:A vampire bat came flapping in from the night, face all covered in blood and parked himself on the roof of the cave to get some sleep.
Pretty soon all the other bats smelled the blood and began hassling him about where he got it.
He told them to piss off and let him get some sleep, but they persisted until he finally gave in. “Okay, follow me.” he said, and flew out of the cave with hundreds of bats behind him, tongues hanging out for blood.
As they came across a large field, the bat stopped and hovered. All the other bats slowed and hovered too. “Do you see that large oak tree over there?” he asked. “YES, YES, YES!” the bats all screamed in a frenzy.
“Good!” said the bat, “Because I fuckin’ didn’t!”
Good! nice one fella
Something better change!
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Five Minutes
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Five Minutes »

What's the difference between a dead junkie on a council estate and a dead junkie in Hollywood? About six million sanctimonious status updates.
Last time I came here a friend of mine just got triple-jacked over a steeplehammer and jessop jessop jessop jessop jessop
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Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by T.F.P.R.H.G »

"how can something made up of 10 pixels be so fckn addictive
said my mrs as she stared at her phone

"are you onthat stupid flabby bird game I asked?"

no she replied " I was looking at that picture of
your cock you sent me earlier ".
Saidagibb !
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