Crap Joke No.83840370

Other non Stranglers stuff here

Moderator: StanInBlack

Post Reply
User avatar
Boody
Ugly
Ugly
Posts: 1228
Joined: 25 Jan 2014, 13:20
Location: Arse end of commuter land, always looking for an escape

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Boody »

droopsnoot wrote:Charles Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities was first serialised in two UK local newspapers.

It was the Bicester Times, it was the Worcester Times.
Well I got it and it gave me the best laugh I have had in a while. Thanks Droopsnoot.
I can't help getting old. I just refuse to grow up.
jason
Man Of The Earth
Man Of The Earth
Posts: 7320
Joined: 02 Oct 2008, 15:34
Location: Kent

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by jason »

My uncle Bill always used to light up the room. Shame he's doing five years for arson now.
User avatar
Homer
Ugly
Ugly
Posts: 1686
Joined: 12 Jan 2004, 10:05
Location: Ready to fuck off ........

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Homer »

I hear Sinead 'O' Conner is doing Barry Chuckles remembrance service.

They've chosen 'Nothin Compares, To Me ..... To You' :grin:
Apple 2.4 ghz Intel 'core 2 duo' MacBook
Bag Lady
BLUE SISTER
BLUE SISTER
Posts: 4736
Joined: 10 Mar 2009, 12:21
Location: SW of Shalford Scout Hut

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Bag Lady »

Boody wrote: 08 Aug 2018, 18:33
droopsnoot wrote:Charles Dickens' A Tale of Two Cities was first serialised in two UK local newspapers.

It was the Bicester Times, it was the Worcester Times.
Well I got it and it gave me the best laugh I have had in a while. Thanks Droopsnoot.
Me too!

(Hi Boody :smt006 )
No one can win against kipple.
PJayBe
Down In The Sewer
Posts: 91
Joined: 01 Jan 2009, 23:51

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by PJayBe »

The wife came in to the lounge wearing not very much whilst I was watching the Grand Prix.

"Fancy taking me upstairs and fucking me senseless?" She asks.

"Not just now." I reply. "I'm watching the motor racing."

"You do realise you can record it"

"Ok you grab the camcorder I'll be up when the Grand Prix has finished"
PJayBe
Down In The Sewer
Posts: 91
Joined: 01 Jan 2009, 23:51

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by PJayBe »

A tree house is the ultimate insult.

You're saying, "I killed a friend of yours, please hold him for me..."
Arthur Streeb-Greebling
Man Of The Earth
Man Of The Earth
Posts: 5872
Joined: 25 Nov 2005, 01:00
Location: All Roads Lead To Leeds

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Arthur Streeb-Greebling »

My girlfriend is 124 years old, yep she’s so old her Pussy is haunted.
Stay in your homes
Stay in your homes
Be off the streets by nightfall
Or get assaulted and robbed by Police thugs
Under the coronavirus lockdown rules
PJayBe
Down In The Sewer
Posts: 91
Joined: 01 Jan 2009, 23:51

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by PJayBe »

Most people have 206 bones in their body but I have nearly 300. Yes, kippers for breakfast again!
Last edited by PJayBe on 19 Aug 2018, 12:46, edited 1 time in total.
PJayBe
Down In The Sewer
Posts: 91
Joined: 01 Jan 2009, 23:51

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by PJayBe »

There's a Haircut 100 concert on Sky's Love channel at the moment.

If you've missed the start you can catch it on Love + 1
User avatar
MULLY
ManinBlack
ManinBlack
Posts: 3977
Joined: 04 Jan 2006, 20:27
Location: BELFAST

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by MULLY »

I visited my local Health Centre complaining of feeling like a Jelly Baby.......

...the G.P. ate my face off :lol:
Allow me to re-arrange your face, sometimes I'd really like to get to know you better
Summer Dreamer
VERSATRAN SERIES F
Posts: 233
Joined: 24 Mar 2011, 16:35

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by Summer Dreamer »

One for the keyboardists out there...

Q. What could be better than having roses around your piano?

A. Having tulips around your organ.

:shock:
Last edited by Summer Dreamer on 21 Aug 2018, 20:01, edited 1 time in total.
'Scaffolding pays good bread'
User avatar
theraven1979
Maninwhite
Maninwhite
Posts: 33371
Joined: 22 Dec 2001, 11:41
Location: Saltaire
Contact:

Re: Crap Joke No.83840370

Post by theraven1979 »

The Burning Up Time taxi is arriving soon for some of you lot!

JIm
"I bathed in sun and walked in rain
It taught me how to laugh again"
Post Reply