ANY CHANCE OF A PISSED UP ROW??!!

[ThruBeingCool]

Night night then Gazza

[C r a s s !]

Ciao for now

[miserablewoman]

Are you gonna tek 20 minutes to write 2 lines Baz?

I thought TBC was just being thoughtful given Alias' request ...

viewtopic.php?f=5&t=14555

I am going to start a Pissed Up Row about the lack of smilies availability ... er ... but not at 6.55am ...

[miserablewoman]

I am going to start a Pissed Up Row about the lack of smilies availability ... er ... but not at 6.55am ...

Friday evening? Yep, I think now is an appropriate timeslot ... Ahem ...

When are the chuffing smilies gonna get fixed on here? I mean how's a supposed to make her point clear without them being available for goodness sake?

I so miss the bouncy blue one ... you know, the one that goes

... life just isn't the same without them

[Bag Lady]

No, that's not fair - you've found a way to get your bouncy back and it won't work for me!!!!

[Arthur Streeb-Greebling]

BMW DRIVERS.......CUNTS!

[beebop]

Especially the ones in those big X5 tractors , mainly snooty women taking their kids to school who dont know their indicators from their wipers

[Arthur Streeb-Greebling]

X5? aye know what you mean, had one right up my arse yesterday and I was doing 72mph, orrible big nasty thing with huge wheels and noticed a 'Child On Board' sign in the back window as I let it past.
You think they would be driving slower and with far more care & attention if there was a 'Child On Board' wouldn't you?
Twunts.

[Arthur Streeb-Greebling]

Especially the ones in those big X5 tractors , mainly snooty women taking their kids to school who dont know their indicators from their wipers

You should know by now that when you see a woman washing her windscreen, she is going to either turn left..........or right !, and if she is indicating, that means she cant see a bloody thing, so get out the way. These are basic things you pick up while driving over the years.
Oh !! if you see the reversing light come on, pull over to a safe place and pray they dont come within a mile of you .


The other thing you pick up on is..........if someone says they were doing "72 mph", it means they were speeding , Mr greebling. Dont play the "calibration" card on here
You were Bombing it wernt you ???

No occifer I wasn't like, honest guv.

[Arthur Streeb-Greebling]

Well known quote when a cop stopped a speeding motorist
Copper..."I`ve been waiting for you all day mate "
Motorist...."Sorry, got here as fast as i could"


Love it when they ask for your date of birth, and you say "18th of the 4th......
Copper...."what year"
Me......."every fuckin year"
They love that !!!...........NOT !!!!!!.

http://www.phespirit.info/derekandclive ... ain_16.htm

CLIVE:
One officer come up to me and he said, "Look! Your motor's weaving all over the k-, all over the road!" I said, "What d'you expect? I'm pissed out of me head!" I said, "Fuck me! Can't you see that? I've got four empty bottles of scotch in the fucking motor .....
DEREK:
What you've-
CLIVE:
..... I'm swigging a bottle scotch now, .....
DEREK:
Right.
CLIVE:
..... can't you understand why I'm swerving about?"
DEREK:
Yeah.
CLIVE:
'c'se I'm fucking drunk, y' cunt!
DEREK:
Yeah! What a cunt, eh?
CLIVE:
He arrested me. Do you what technicality he got me on?
DEREK:
What?
CLIVE:
Murder.
DEREK:
Oh, fucking hell.

[theraven1979]

On a similar theme I hate it when a cop car is on the motorway doing 70 so everyone else does 70. You can overtake you know and you'll be fine - done it many a time - in fact I think they respect you for it

Jim

[APOLLO79]

Many years ago I had the fortune to use Jet's 'Cunt' phrase against one of Strathclydes finest.You know the one.."What if I said,etc"Sweden.

Picture this:Doing something I shouldn't be doing which leads to your door being put in and 13 plain clothes pile through the door.They
search high and low and generally cause mischief and damage.Two young rockets are really enthusiastic in their roles to the extent that
they take it too far..even the old hands recognise this.....I take exception and take the male fucker out.....

me:"Hey tit!"
Tit:"You talkin to me?"
me:"Who else? whit ye aw aboot?"
Tit"Fuck up or I'll nick ye!"
me:"Really?Ok..what if I call you a cunt?"
Tit:"Eh?
me:"What if I call you a cunt?" By this time the auld hands and the Mrs twig said tit is getting it.
Tit:"Who ye talkin tae? I'll fuckin nick ye!"Much sniggering amongst his colleagues starts and the wife
knowing the drill,laughs and waits on the punchline.
me:"Ok,what if I thought that you're a cunt?Would that make any difference?"
Tit:"Whit d'ye mean?"
me:"Well,if I thought you were a cunt,in my heid,you wouldn't know but if I called ye wan ye'd nick me,is that right?"
Tit:"Shut up..."By this time all 16 of us in the room know what's coming next except this Tit....until it's too late..
me:"Well you know something?I THINK yer a total cunt!" By this time everyone in the room are pissin themselves and said Tit
has decked me and cuffed me for a breach(which was dropped)and was carted away for a six hour stint in a cell.

At the time the cunt deserved it.An over zealous new start with an attitude.
And to this day I don't regret giving six hours of my life to fuck him up.
Things have changed.I've changed.My life's changed.I don't do the things I used to do.
This was fourteen years ago.

But to me,to fuck over a daft cunt who thought breaking glass on a picture,amongst other things was fun was worth it.



Wouldn't dream of doing it now.....too auld for that shit!